


Who Goes There

by safetypin



Series: Star High Chats [3]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), Supergirl (TV 2015), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Gen, Group chat, Multi, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-05-24 16:24:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14958047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/safetypin/pseuds/safetypin
Summary: Wally just wants to be loved, Kara wants some friends, Jax wants to know how to love both his best friends, Thea wants to step out of her brother's shadow, Roy wants to be himself, and Jesse just wants everyone to please calm down.During the events of "Who Talks First?" and "We're So Queer," our favorite younger siblings and sidekicks have a chat of their own.





	1. September 20th

**Author's Note:**

> And we're back again! This time with a whole new cast of characters ready to tear each other to shreds over mis-read emoticons. 
> 
> In chapter one we see roasting, Simon VS universe spoilers, BuzzFeed quizzes, and lots of caps lock.
> 
> Ages:  
> Jesse Wells - Freshman
> 
> Jax Jackson - Freshman
> 
> Wally West - Freshman
> 
> Thea Queen - Sophomore
> 
> Roy Harper - Sophomore 
> 
> Kara Danvers - Sophomore

**[Kara Danvers has added Jesse Wells, Jax Jackson, Wally West, Thea Queen, and Roy Harper to the chat]**

**[Kara Danvers has named the chat _“Whomst Goes There”_ ]**

**Kara:** Welcome to the chat people in my fourth period study hall that I actually want to talk to!  
**Kara:** I figured this would be okay since we’re all acquainted

 **Wally:** I feel so powerful knowing everyone here really well

 **Thea:** To be fair we all know each other anyway  
**Thea:** Our school isn’t that big

 **Jesse:** Also aren’t your brothers are dating?

 **Wally:** Maybe so

 **Roy:** Call out

 **Thea:** Roy you are the worst best friend ever

 **Jesse:** Now that’s a call out

 **Kara:** Jesse you’re amazing please marry me

 **Jesse:** Sorry honey Lena Luthor already called dibs on you

 **Jax:** And I called dibs on Jess

 **Kara:** Booo

 **Thea:** Ew couples

 **Wally:** I feel that

 **Roy:** SAME

 **Wally:** Oh please we all know you and Greyson are bumping uglies, ugly

 **Roy:** Stop ganging up on me OMG

 **Thea:** Never you little shit

 **Jesse:** Damn guys

 **Kara:** Wally are you ok? That was a damn call out right there

 **Wally:** I’m never ok

 **Thea:** Same

 **Kara:** Ok then

***

 **Jesse:** Fun fact - my dad used to call Google “Groogle”

 **Wally:** And yet he's considered as smart as Lucius Fox

 **Jesse:** Somehow  
**Jesse:** The man's like a grub  
**Jesse:** Once there's one, you've got an infestation of them 

**Wally:** Beautiful metaphor 

**Jax:** A+

 **Jesse:** Why thank you

***

 **Kara:** Which “Love, Simon” Character Are You Actually? https://www.buzzfeed.com/jennaguillaume/which-love-simon-character-are-you-actually?utm_term=.jn1oX4RXk#.jvbyDp2Dn  
**Kara:** I got Leah and it’s very accurate

 **Jax:** I got Simon yesss

 **Thea:** ABBY HELL YEAH

 **Roy:** I got Lyle???

 **Jesse:** I too got Leah

 **Kara:** TWINS

 **Wally:** I got Bram

 **Jax:** Guess we gotta date now man  
**Jax:** I kid I kid

 **Jesse:** Aw babe you’re gay? Why didn’t you tell me?

 **Jax:** Guess I gotta throw out my bi flag now

 **Jesse:** Shit am I supposed to be straight?

 **Roy:** Shit AM I?

 **Kara:** Leah on the Offbeat made canon of Leah being bi

 **Jesse:** Oh thank god (haven’t read it yet)

 **Thea:** Abby is bi and I refuse to believe otherwise  
**Thea:** Also Roy is freaking out it’s hilarious

 **Roy:** I don’t want to be straight ok!

 **Jesse:** LOL

 **Jax:** Oh god it’s a het  
**Jax:** Get away

 **Wally:** Jax are you heterophobic?

 **Jax:** Yes

 **Roy:** I think we all are

 **Jesse:** Bitch me too the fuck

***

 **Kara:** Apparently I yelled at my mom while sleeping  
**Kara:** I have no memory of it but I guess she came into my room to ask for help with something and I told her I was sleeping and to leave me alone  
**Kara:** I really hope she's not messing with me

 **Roy:** Maybe you were possessed  
**Roy:** It happens to the best of us 

**Kara:** Possibly cause I don't want to talk in my sleep

 **Wally:** Possession happens to the best of us??!!

 **Roy:** Yes of does Wally

 **Kara:** Apparently I was awake and stuff but I don't remember

 **Jesse:** Odd

***

 **Roy:** _(audio message)_ Funky horns

 **Jesse:** WHAT THE FUCK Roy

 **Roy:** IDK OK  
**Roy:** I was listening to a song with these horns  
**Roy:** and I just said funky horns and apparently it was recording

 **Thea:** What did it say?

 **Roy:** Funky horns

 **Thea:** So it was you??

 **Roy:** Yes. I know I sound dead

 **Jesse:** That sounds nothing like you and it was actually really weird

 **Roy:** Maybe I'm possessed 

**Thea:** Two in one day?

 **Roy:** Shit happens

***

 **Kara:** Does anyone know when Mr. Rogers died?  
**Kara:** 2014?

 **Jesse:** No he was way dead by then it was 2003

 **Kara:** WHAT  
**Kara:** So I used to watch reruns of his show??

 **Jesse:** Yeah me too  
**Jesse:** It’s weird

 **Kara:** IKR 

**Wally:** It is  
**Wally:** Mr. Rogers was amazing

 **Kara:** I’m having major throwback right now

 **Wally:** Same

 **Jesse:** He was the best part of my childhood

 **Kara:** Innocence

 **Jax:** Same tho  
**Jax:** Except for drawing

 **Wally:** There were a few other good things  
**Wally:** Like stuffed animals

 **Jax:** Oh those too

 **Wally:** They were my best friends

 **Kara:** SAME

 **Jesse:** Other than the radio I swear I used to listen to only three bands; Linkin Park, Train, and Owl City

 **Jax:** For me it was Train, ABBA, and John Denver

 **Wally:** _{Image of an old and worn stuffed cow with a red ribbon around its neck}_

**Wally:** Meet Cow-Cow Von Cow

 **Thea:** Aww cow  
**Thea:** Mooooo  
**Thea:** Moo with me

 **Wally:** He will not

 **Thea:** Aw why

 **Wally:** He has very high standards  
**Wally:** And he’s into guys  
**Wally:** (He’s also trans)

 **Kara:** Aw

 **Jax:** It’s just mooing

 **Wally:** He takes his mooing very seriously

 **Thea:** I am a high standard thank you very much  
**Thea:** But it’s cool he’s into guys

 **Wally:** I SAID HE’S INTO GUYS  
**Wally:** ARE YOU A GUY THEA  
**Wally:** NO

 **Thea:** AND I SAID THAT WAS COOL  
**Thea:** BUT THAT I’M ALSO A HIGH STANDARD

 **Jesse:** Can I ask a sorta bizarre question

 **Jax:** Go ahead

 **Jesse:** What gender were most of the things you named throughout life?

 **Kara:** Mine were mostly female

 **Jax:** Mine were a mix

 **Wally:** THEY VERED 

**Thea:** SAME

 **Jesse:** LOL

 **Wally:** SOME WERE GENDERLESS

 **Thea:** ALSO SAME

 **Jesse:** FOR ME FEMALE WAS THE DEFAULT  
**Jesse:** IDK WHY

 **Thea:** HUH COOL

 **Wally:** I MEAN FOR ME THE MAJORITY ENDED UP WITH FEMALE NAMES

 **Kara:** INTERESTING

 **Jax:** YOU KNOW WHAT’S WEIRD? APPARENTLY I HAD A DOLL NAMED CHELSEA WHO NEVER WORE CLOTHES

 **Thea:** THAT IS WEIRD

 **Jesse:** HUH

 **Jax:** IT IS RIGHT

 **Kara:** I LIKE THAT NAME

 **Jax:** THANKS  
**Jax:** IDK IF I CAME UP WITH IT OR IF IT WAS ON THE BOX

 **Thea:** I WAS VERY INTO PUTTING DOLLS INTO NICE OUTFITS

 **Jax:** THAT SOUNDS MUCH NICER

 **Thea:** IT PROBABLY WAS FOR MY PARENTS

 **Wally:** I USED TO DO THAT FOR PAPER DOLLS

 **Jax:** I WAS ALSO VERY ATTACHED TO CHELSEA AND BROUGHT HER EVERYWHERE  
**Jax:** SO THAT’S MY EARLY CHILDHOOD

 **Kara:** I HAD A STUFFED MOOSE I DID THAT WITH

 **Wally:** ME WITH COW-COW

 **Jesse:** I HAD A BUNCH OF STUFFED CATS THAT WENT EVERYWHERE WITH ME

 **Thea:** COOL I HAD A BLACK AND WHITE STUFFED KITTEN

 **Kara:** AWW

***

 **Jax:** I remember when my 5th grade teacher told me not to take apart my calculator because it was dangerous  
**Jax:** For the record calculators are 99.9% safe to disassemble  
**Jax:** The other .1% is if you short it and start a fire

 **Jesse:** Why am I dating you 

**Jax:** Don’t ask me

***

 **Thea:** My mom wants me to get a job and I’m like no  
**Thea:** I’m never getting a job ever

 **Kara:** Why wouldn’t you want to make money to get away from your parents  
**Kara:** That’s what I’m gonna do

 **Thea:** It’s scary

 **Jesse:** You’d be fine

 **Thea:** You’d think but no

 **Jesse:** Fair enough but it would be awesome to have your own money to spend

 **Thea:** I’d rather get scratch and lottery tickets

 **Kara:** You need money to get lotto tickets

 **Thea:** I’ll spend what I’ve got and cross my fingers that I’ll strike it rich

 **Jax:** That’s not a very sustainable plan

 **Thea:** I’m not a very sustainable plan 

***

 **Thea:** Laurel’s telling people the story of how she fell down a volcano again

 **Roy:** Oh that’s a good one  
**Roy:** But it was just down the side of it right?

 **Thea:** Yeah

 **Wally:** Roy you’ve heard it? Why haven’t we?

 **Thea:** Cause he practically lived with us for like a year and Laurel’s always over  
**Thea:** Anyway yeah the one where she broke her collarbone

 **Roy:** Yeah but it’s not like she fell into the lava part

 **Thea:** Ya got a point


	2. September 21st

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today we encounter the reality of rabbits, how to call dibs on a person, and quotes from the 8th grade

**Kara:** Hey Jess when you said Lena called dibs on me did you mean it? Cause I really want her to ask me out

**Jesse:** I mean once I saw her point at you in front of Jimmy Olsen and say “dibs”  
 **Jesse:** Pretty sure she’s into you

**Roy:** You could always ask her out yourself

**Kara:** Please I have AnXiEtY

**Thea:** Lemme help you out   
**Thea:** I’ll text her

**Kara:** THEA WAIT

**Thea:** She’s probably going to ask you out tomorrow during your P.E. class

**Kara:** OH MY GOD  
 **Kara:** I’ll be all sweaty and gross

**Jesse:** If she really likes you she’ll like you sweaty and gross too

**Thea:** Yeah what Jess said

**Kara:** Ok  
 **Kara:** Thanks girls

**Thea:** Np!

**Jesse:** Always hon

***

**Roy:** What if I told you it was weird to not be weird

**Kara:** Well that’s just weird

**Jax:** Everyone is weird in some way

**Thea:** I’m weird

**Roy:** LOL same

***

**Thea:** #I want to get fucked by the past and the future at the same time  
 **Thea:** #Quoting Deadpool

**Wally:** LOL

**Thea:** #Seriously don’t quote me on that

***

**Wally:** According to something called “GEN 5:2” I was made by satan  
 **Wally:** I think I need to have a chat with satan

**Jesse:** Weren’t we all

**Kara:** That’s better than being made by boring old sex

**Roy:** Yo satan is my goddamned husband

**Jesse:** I see what you did there

**Roy:** It was good right

**Wally:** Yes it was

***

**Jesse:** On a new note; why is Area 51 so secret?  
 **Jesse:** Time to watch a movie on it

**Roy:** LOL

**Jesse:** It’s very odd  
 **Jesse:** Area 51: CIA Secrets

**Kara:** Is it Pretty Odd

**Jesse:** I don’t get the reference

**Kara:** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3f3K2sEHuIM Panic! At the Disco: That Green Gentleman [Official Video]

**Jesse:** Ah

***

**Jax:** Hey Wally I liked that shirt you had on today

**Wally:** The tiny cacti? 

**Jax:** Yes! They were so cute!

**Wally:** Thanks! Iris bought it for me on valentines day from old navy  
 **Wally:** I think they still sell them if you want one

**Jax:** Right  
 **Jax:** Thanks

***

**Wally:** I’m hiding in the corner of my room with my plant and my phone and lots of pillows  
 **Wally:** This is my life

**Kara:** I’m sitting on my bed thinking about being a published author  
 **Kara:** My life

**Jax:** I’m thinking about thinking

**Wally:** What a concept

**Kara:** LOL

**Jax:** I’m also envisioning myself in the future which is slightly more normal

**Kara:** In some ways

**Wally:** LOL  
 **Wally:** I have a legacy already is that good or bad?

**Jax:** Depends on the legacy

**Wally:** True true

**Kara:** I probably have one on tumblr…

**Jax:** That doesn’t surprise me

***

**Kara:** My mood right now is listening to A Total Eclipse of the Heart at top volume with headphones on  
 **Kara:** It’s so loud

**Roy:** Don’t break your ears like I did  
 **Roy:** Had to buy new ones off EBay

**Kara:** Yeah I stopped

**Wally:** Huh

**Roy:** But I def have hearing issues now

**Kara:** Yeah I’m good without the last thing I hear being Total Eclipse of the Heart

***

**Kara:** Y’all I need adjectives like artist or rebel or something  
 **Kara:** Just give me a few

**Wally:** Reader  
 **Wally:** Gardener

**Kara:** Thanks!

**Jax:** Anxious

**Kara:** Oh I can do that

**Jax:** Depression

**Jesse:** Depression is not an adjective   
**Jesse:** LOL

**Kara:** This is good thank you

**Jax:** Cher  
 **Jax:** I’m so gay

**Jesse:** It’s a fact of life

**Wally:** Same tho  
 **Wally:** Well I try my best

**Thea:** I’m so dead

**Jesse:** Same

**Wally:** Also same

***

**Thea:** We’re so dysfunctional  
 **Thea:** Roy is literally sitting right across from me and yet we’re texting insead

**Roy:** True

**Wally:** We would be doing this even if all of us were there

**Roy:** Also true

**Thea:** LOL

**Jesse:** _[Image of Jesse with very messy hair]_  
 **Jesse:** But I look particularly dysfunctional today

**Wally:** _[Image of Wally looking very tired]_  
 **Wally:** I look semi fuck it all  
 **Wally:** That was supposed to say functional

**Thea:** You do tho

**Roy:** I look dead

**Jesse:** LOL

***

**Jesse:** Unpopular opinion:   
**Jesse:** Boobs are just organic milk jugs

**Thea:** I mean, you’re not wrong

**Kara:** Hey ditto  
 **Kara:** I was legit about to say that

**Jesse:** Amazing

**Kara:** Wow LOL

***

**Thea:** Here we stan the LEGO Movie  
 **Thea:** Even though SOME PEOPLE seem to dislike it for no valid reason

**Roy:** Fucking call out

**Wally:** Is Thea calling YOU out?

**Roy:** Yes  
 **Roy:** I just like other movies better  
 **Roy:** I never said it was bad

**Wally:** LOL

**Thea:** Still  
 **Thea:** Traitor

***

**Thea:** I’m in a MoodTM 

**Wally:** What kind of MoodTM?

**Thea:** A we’re all gonna die so let’s live it up mood

**Jax:** Same

**Kara:** That’s a valid MoodTM

**Wally:** #whyKara

***

**Kara:** Guess who fell off their moms bed

**Wally:** Your dog

**Kara:** I wish

**Wally:** Hm

**Jesse:** Your unicorn?

**Roy:** You

**Kara:** Yes me

**Wally:** Oh darn

**Kara:** She won’t stop laughing at me damn it

**Roy:** RIP

**Jesse:** How’d it happen

**Kara:** I rolled backwards

**Jesse:** Oh I see

**Wally:** Ah  
 **Wally:** Well it could have been worse

**Kara:** Sure  
 **Kara:** The bed could’ve been taller

**Roy:** Exactly

***

**Jesse:** Did I ever share the story of how I flirted with a girl in a supermarket in Florida to get a larger slice of free cake?

**Wally:** Iconic

**Thea:** What a power move

**Jax:** I can’t even complain about that it’s so funny

**Jesse:** It was really good cake too!  
Jesse: And she was very cute

**Wally:** What a bicon

**Thea:** Someday your love of cake will sabotage you

**Jesse:** Not today, bitch, not today

***

**Kara:** Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a rabbit

**Jax:** I bet it’s rabbity

**Thea:** You sit in your own shit all day and eat veggies

**Kara:** Seriously?

**Jax:** That’s nasty

**Thea:** I had rabbits in elementary school

**Kara:** I see

**Roy:** I had bad teeth in elementary school

**Jax:** WTF Roy

**Roy:** It’s true

**Jax:** Yeah but so not relevant

***

**Thea:** Oh fuck me I accidentally deleted my insta post  
 **Thea:** Ahhhh  
 **Thea:** Life is hell

**Jax:** Oh no

**Jesse:** Ditto tho

**Jax:** I distinctly remember Wally once saying “life is a gay hell”

**Wally:** Stop quoting 8th grade me oh my god

**Jesse:** LOL it’s a good quote

**Jax:** But life is a gay hell honey

**Thea:** It’s also true

***

**Wally:** Why can’t I just dig a hole and jump in and come out the other side to a perfect world

**Thea:** Oh same

**Kara:** That sounds fun

**Wally:** Hell I might give it a shot what do I have to lose

**Jesse:** Uhh arm strength

**Kara:** Dirt

**Wally:** Both of those are true

**Thea:** What about being buried alive??

**Wally:** Is that such a bad thing?

**Kara:** Yes

**Jesse:** Yes it is

**Thea:** Uh yeah

**Wally:** Unfortunate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts?  
> Kudos?


	3. September 22nd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tonight brings fifth grade memories, Wally being an air hockey champion, and Kara getting her date

**Jax:** For some reason Hurrah reminds me of Huzzah which reminds me of 5th grade which reminds me of the good morning music thing we did

**Wally:** Eina Kilena Morgan Musik

Thea: Holy shit

**Jax:** How do you remember these things?

**Wally:** I’m a fountain of useless knowledge

**Jesse:** I think we all are

***

**Jesse:** I’m permanently scarred… I read the meaning behind barber poles

**Kara:** Why?

**Jesse:** Cause someone told me something about the red being blood about 5 years ago and I didn’t believe them so I finally decided to look into it… I regret it

**Kara:** What’s the truth 

**Jesse:** It’s supposed to represent blood

**Wally:** Oh why

**Thea:** Because barbers were originally dentists as well

**Jesse:** And surgeons  
 **Jesse:** And they would remove blood because apparently blood cause disease, and they gave patients a pole to hold onto so they could see the veins then they’d wrap the wound with white cloth and hand it on the pole hence the red and white pole

**Wally:** Huh

**Thea:** I love how people thought blood caused disease

**Kara:** IKR

***

**Thea:** I saw a bat  
 **Thea:** It flew out of the rafters as bats do  
 **Thea:** It looked at me like “...WTF I was napping here”  
 **Thea:** And I was like “Dude you’re always napping”  
 **Thea:** And it was like “...”   
**Thea:** And then it flew away into the woods  
 **Thea:** That’s not even close to what actually happened  
 **Thea:** It flew out of a rafter when my dad pulled a board out and then it flew away

**Roy:** I think I like your version of events better 

**Jax:** LOL

***

**Roy:** I want cookies  
 **Roy:** But they don’t just grow on trees LOL

**Jax:** Or do they?

**Kara:** No they don’t I bake them

**Roy:** LOL

**Jax:** Kara is the cookie tree

**Kara:** That I am

**Wally:** I feel that we would all make very good plants

**Roy:** Aww

**Kara:** Yess

***

**Kara:** Someday I’ll write a movie that includes a sex scene set to a Cat Stevens song  
 **Kara:** That’s on my bucket list now

**Roy:** Oh?

**Jax:** You’re alive

**Kara:** Is that a question or a statement

**Jax:** I’m… not sure

**Kara:** Ok then

**Jesse:** I love it  
 **Jesse:** You should do that

**Roy:** The real question is what Cat Stevens song

**Jax:** True

**Kara:** Like… See What Love Did To Me  
 **Kara:** Or The Wind if you want to be cheesy

**Jesse:** What about If You Want to Sing Out

**Kara:** OMG yes

**Roy:** All those songs work

**Kara:** I just feel like if there’s one way to to make sex look wholesome it’s by setting it to Cat Stevens

**Jax:** That makes a lot of sense

**Jesse:** I can totally see where you get that from

**Kara:** Right?!

**Roy:** Now that I’ve thought about it that really may be the only way

**Thea:** I absolutely agree

…

**Thea:** Why do I have the feeling Kara is already writing the sex scene

**Kara:** Excuse you I have been sitting on my bed eating chips

**Jax:** LOL

**Jesse:** Oh fair enough

**Roy:** That’s valid

**Thea:** Damnit Roy

***

**Kara:** Y’all  
 **Kara:** It happened  
 **Kara:** I’m a taken woman

**Jax:** I’m a taken woman

**Jesse:** Babe

**Jax:** What I meant by that was congrats

**Kara:** Thank you  
 **Kara:** We’re going out on Saturday

**Thea:** So we’ve got three days to get you ready  
 **Thea:** For your DATE

**Kara:** AHHH

**Jesse:** AHHH

**Roy:** AHHH  
 **Roy:** WHY ARE WE SCREAMING

**THEA:** Kara has a date with Lena that’s why you idiot

**Roy:** OH congrats!

**Kara:** THANKS

***

**Wally:** There’s a slim chance I broke part of my middle finger  
 **Wally:** And if I did I did so in the stupidest way possible

**Kara:** Oh no!

**Thea:** What happened

**Wally:** A FUCKING AIR HOCKEY PUCK HIT IT

**Kara:** And this is how the air hockey legend falls and a new one must take their place  
 **Kara:** If air hockey was a sport this would be big news  
 **Kara:** Will the all star Wally West be able to play next season

**Wally:** AHAHA  
 **Wally:** My latest sports injury

**Jax:** Wally are you good or did it actually break   
**Jax:** Because I will be amazed if it did

**Wally:** Nah it’s just sore and swollen

**Kara:** Damn 

***

**Jesse:** There’s a lot of thunder   
**Jesse:** Well jeez Zeus calm down  
 **Jesse:** Oh he’s crying 

**Roy:** I used to say he was arguing with Poseidon

**Jesse:** Oh I like that

***

**Jesse:** Question; would you consider “boi” to be a male term?

**Roy:** I use it to refer to myself because I consider to be masc but not purely male

**Jesse:** Ah ok  
 **Jesse:** I suppose it’s not my #1 informal address choice then

**Jax:** Gal is better for you

**Roy:** Or Gurl

**Jesse:** I do prefer those

**Roy:** I like boi or dude myself

**Jesse:** Good to know

***

**Wally:** Can I just marry a rich hot guy  
 **Wally:** And in this situation guy is gender neutral

**Jax:** To quote Roy that’s a mood

**Wally:** But like seriously I’m perfectly content to stay in a mansion all day 

**Kara:** As long as they have respect for me I’m down

**Thea:** As long as they buy me stuff

**Jax:** Oh true

**Wally:** I just wanna listen to some music and dance through the house  
 **Wally:** Drink wine

**Thea:** Eat fancy food

**Kara:** Read pretentious shit and write like the next Oscar Wilde

**Wally:** Exactly

**Jax:** Travel the world

**Roy:** Have someone else pay the taxes

**Thea:** Get lots of shopping money

**Wally:** They’d need to be just a little bit smarter than me too for practical reasons

**Kara:** Hell no  
 **Kara:** I don’t want someone smarter than me  
 **Kara:** Equal intelligence  
 **Kara:** But hotter is fine

**Roy:** My new plan in life is to marry rich and no one can stop me

**Jax:** I need someone to help me with daily stuff and bills and voting since I can’t do it alone

**Thea:** The other option is to go all Bonnie and Clyde and we all know that doesn’t end well

***

**Jesse:** Do y’all believe in soul mates

**Wally:** Yes

**Jesse:** Same

**Jax:** I believe there can be multiple for the same person

**Wally:** I agree with that

**Jesse:** Just hope you run into one of them

**Jax:** Totes my goats


	4. Kara Gets a Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara has her date, Thea plots, and Roy is still an idiot

**Wally:** Kara how’d that date go!?!?

**Kara:** OMG it went great!  
 **Kara:** We went to the burger palace and we split a milkshake  
 **Kara:** Turns out she’s vegetarian but she loves veggie burgers

**Thea:** I’m so glad this worked out for you!!

**Kara:** Thank you!!  
 **Kara:** And thank you so much for your help

**Thea:** Aw anything for a friend or two

**Kara:** <3

**Thea:** <3

**Roy:** Ew happiness

**Jesse:** Fuck off Harper

***

**Wally:** I want to go away and buy chickens  
 **Wally:** I either want chicks or a baby duck

**Jax:** Duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck

**Kara:** Duuuuccckkkksss

**Roy:** Ducks don’t give fucks  
 **Roy:** That’s my new life motto

**Kara:** Amazing

**Jesse:** I think the general consensus is that you should get ducks

**Wally:** I think so, yes

***

**Jesse:** What’s the hottest language that someone can speak other than English

**Kara:** Isn’t French supposed to be hot

**Jesse:** Yesssssss

**Thea:** Qui

**Jesse:** Guess we know what I think

**Thea:** Take note, Jax

**Jax:** I’m all for dirty talk in Latin

**Jesse:** You sound like Rathaway or my dad

**Jax:** Please don’t compare my dirty talk to your dad

**Kara:** How does that even sound

**Jesse:** IDK that’s why I’d go with French  
 **Jesse:** Cause what’s the point of dirty talk if your S/O can’t understand it

***

**Kara:** Beep boop

**Wally:** Bweep bwoop

**Thea:** Sheep shoop

**Jesse:** A sheep shop!  
 **Jesse:** A shop were sheep sell human skin in revenge

**Kara:** Oh LOL

**Wally:** Well sheep

**Thea:** BAAAA

***

**Kara:** People always pick Tuesdays Mondays or weekends as the days to say things started with and I refuse to give into this one trope

**Jax:** Huh interesting

**Wally:** So what do you use? Thursdays?

**Kara:** Wednesdays or Thursdays

**Wally:** Oh I forgot about Wednesdays 

**Jax:** It’s always an odd day

**Kara:** All the better to start with

**Thea:** Wait  
 **Thea:** Are you including Fridays with weekends

**Kara:** Yes

**Thea:** Oh ok

***

**Jax:** Have you ever noticed that tap water from the bathroom tastes different than tap water from the kitchen?

**Jesse:** Yes

**Jax:** Why is that?

**Thea:** It could be filtered differently

**Jax:** Not for me I have well water and it’s all the same pipes and same filter

**Jesse:** Maybe with city water tho

**Kara:** Perhaps the fact that you get it from the bathroom just makes it seem different even if it’s the same

**Roy:** We could all be psychologically conditioned to think they’re different

**Jax:** Yes that

***

**Kara:** I hate Anime with a burning passion

**Thea:** That’s quite the change from when I met you

**Jax:** HAHAHA

**Kara:** Like you have nothing shameful in your past

**Thea:** Oh I do  
 **Thea:** I just laugh at it

**Jax:** Fair enough

**Jesse:** See no one can hold my Supernatural phase against me because they’d have no proof of it

**Kara:** Well now we do

**Jesse:** But I could be lying  
 **Jesse:** There’s no fic, no fan art, no merch  
 **Jesse:** It’s not even on my Netflix

**Thea:** Wow how did you do that

**Jax:** Impressive

**Kara:** Still not as bad as Anime though

**Jesse:** That’s debatable

**Kara:** It’s really not  
 **Kara:** Have you seen Free?  
 **Kara:** HAVE YOU SEEN FREE?

**Jesse:** No

**Kara:** Then you have no argument

**Roy:** No none of you have anything on my Deez Nuts phase  
 **Roy:** Nothing is worse

**Jax:** Oh true

**Jesse:** Have you heard of what goes down in the SPN fandom though

**Thea:** LOL

**Roy:** None of you can top mine

**Kara:** Again  
 **Kara:** Free

**Jesse:** Again the scary amount of incest in the Supernatural fandom

**Roy:** Again Deez Nuts I mean come on  
 **Roy:** What’s worse than an entire Deez Nuts Taylor Swift parody

**Thea:** I forgot you did that

**Kara:** How about we all agree we have terrible pasts that none of us need to talk about and we’re all equal

**Roy:** LOL sure works for me

**Jesse:** Agreed

**Jax:** A pact has been made

…

**Wally:** Jesus Christ y’all did some messed up stuff

**Jesse:** Shh honey don’t remind us

**Roy:** Yeah we made a pact

**Wally:** HAHA I DIDN’T

**Jesse:** Shit

***

**Roy:** Once I padlocked myself to a piece of furniture and refused to move

**Kara:** Congrats

**Roy:** Either that or I padlocked my hands together   
**Roy:** I don’t remember

**Thea:** Kinky

**Kara:** LOL

**Roy:** I was like 9

**Thea:** No longer kinky

**Jax:** Yeah no

***

_{Jesse Wells has removed Wally West from “Whomst Goes There”}_

**Jesse:** Hey Thea any chance you can help us get Wally to date us  
 **Jesse:** Jax and I keep flirting with him but HE DOESN’T GET IT

**Jax:** Please help

**Thea:** Let me try some things  
 **Thea:** Things being getting Iris to convince him to meet her for a movie where you two are waiting for him and not her

**Roy:** Thea that’s cheesy as fuck

**Jax:** I LOVE IT

**Jesse:** Ok but it better be for Flatliners

**Thea:** I’m on it

**Jesse:** THANK

_{Jesse Wells has added Wally West to “Whomst Goes There”}_

**Wally:** Hey what the fuck

**Jesse:** Sorry gossip was happening 

**Thea:** You don’t need to know

**Wally:** Well fuck you too

**Roy:** We love you too

***

**Roy:** “I’m awkward and nervous” AKA my favorite The Wonder Years lyric

**Kara:** That's relatable AF

**Roy:** Very much so

**Wally:** That’s my constant state of being

**Jax:** It’s 50% of mine

**Wally:** What’s the other 50%?

**Jax:** Depressed and smooth

**Kara:** That works LOL

**Roy:** Too bad you can’t control it

**Jax:** Yeah it sucks

**Wally:** That does suck

**Jax:** That’s when we say fuck it and do our best

**Kara:** That in my opinion is the number one way to deal with things

**Wally:** Agreed

**Kara:** It really throws a curveball at anxiety  
 **Kara:** Like anxiety wasn’t expecting you to say fuck you

**Roy:** Neither does depression

**Wally:** That’s very good

**Kara:** Can you believe I made a sports analogy

**Jax:** To be fair curveballs are pretty common analogy fodder

**Wally:** Very true  
 **Wally:** I used to watch sports once upon a dark time

**Roy:** Wow

***

**Jesse:** In a horrific turn of events I deleted all my eighties music by accident

**Roy:** Oh god

**Thea:** Oh no!

**Jesse:** How am I supposed to be a girl that just wants to have fun  
 **Jesse:** Or a maniac   
**Jesse:** When will my dreams be made of sweet things  
 **Jesse:** How can I bless the rains down in Africa

**Thea:** Wow

**Jesse:** I can no longer put kisses on my list  
 **Jesse:** My heart can only do a half eclipse

**Roy:** Please stop

**Jesse:** Never

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are we back? Maybe?

**Author's Note:**

> Quick disclaimer: Characters are not mine; however any errors are in fact mine; and if the characters seem OOC, that's because these are my text messages and those are not written with specific characters in mind.


End file.
